Tag Archives: pain

Had to put this down in words


I just thought I would put this down in words while I’m on the laptop and its in my head as I know, like everything else, I’ll just put it on the back burner and forget about it.
It comes to something when you are dreading going back to work, even after just one day off. You prey for the days to go fast so that your next day off comes around quickly. Well thats how I feel at the moment. I feel up and down health wise. I still feel I’m not right with this bug or whatever knocking me for six every day and making me just want to sleep and sapping me of all enthusiasm to do the normal stuff in life. Theres also the stress, and depression stuff that coincides with that at the same time which seems to double the tiredness and downers.
I know Denise is having a hard and busy time at work so she’s pretty run down as well. I hate seeing her like that. It’s not the normal Denise I know and love. She also has worries about her Dad who’s in hospital after having a knee replacement.
Then on top of that there’s Georgia with her health problems ( I.B.S ) which is upsetting her and getting her anxious about going to school. As a parent, its horrible seeing your child so messed up and unhappy about stuff. I know we will eventually get her diet sorted out to figure out what she can and cannot eat and get her feeling a bit better, or a lot better hopefully, but for now its hard watching her get so upset about it.
I am so looking forward to when we all start feeling a lot better. I hope it’s sooner rather than later but for now, like everyone else has to do, we will try to keep smiling and soldier on.
Thanks for taking the time to read this.
Take care everyone

A visit to the docs. Things are not right.

What a week and a half I have had. Last Sunday I woke up to find I had blister type things on my face. They were right across the right hand side of my face. I decided to keep and eye on it to make sure they didn’t get any worse, which sods law, they did. Right down my cheek from just below my eye down to my chin. This also meant they were in amongst my whiskers. They were sore. I rang the docs and managed to get an appointment pretty quickly for after work. I was expecting them to say they were bites or an allergic reaction to something.

When the doctor took one look at them she rushed out and down the corridor. I heard her urgently asking another doctor to quickly come and have a look as it looks like another the same as the other one earlier. The two doctors came in and the second doctor took one look at my face and confirmed that I had in fact developed Shingles. You could of knocked me down with a feather. I never even considered that option. I was all for it being bites. How wrong I was.

I got prescribed tablets to combat it and warned to try and avoid coming into contact with the elderly, people who are pregnant and people   who have a low immune system. I had to tell him my job involves going to elderly peoples homes. They seemed quite sure I would be ok with these customers as long as I didn’t get too close initially. I did as requested.

Since then it seems to of got better. They scabbed over and become very itchy and sore, but not weeping, which is good. As well as taking my tablets I have been using antiseptic cream on my face to try and sooth it. Today I was told I will no longer be infectious.

I have read that Shingles can be caused by being run down. Recently, for quiet a few weeks now, I have not felt my normal self. I have felt totally out of sorts. Virtually every night I have been finishing my dinner then going to bed absolutely shattered. I’m talking about 7.30 at night sometimes.

As well as always being tired, I have been losing weight without trying even after eating pizza, or pie and chips, and having ice cream every night. I also have been feeling really sick every morning. Sick to the point where I physically want to vomit at the very thought of having some toast. Yesterday morning I had a quarter of a slice of toast. I’ve also been peeing a lot even though I’m not drinking a great deal. I know there is a history of diabetes in my family but all tests I have had in the past have come back negative.

Like I say, things are not right and I want to know why.

Due to the way I’m feeling recently, I have been to the doctors and requested a full blood test. That was done today. I should hear back within 2 weeks, unless something serious is discovered, then they will get in touch straight away.

I am sick of feeling like this. I need to find out what is causing it. Its been going on way before the Shingles started. Lets hope, they find a reason why this is happening.

In so much pain Weekly roundup 4th March 2016 (Vlog #241)

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Feeling ill at the weekend (Vlog #237)

Weekend plans are put on hold due to illness.

Shot on Canon Powershot G7X
Edited on Adobe Premier Pro CS5.5

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Trip to Edinburgh Day 1 (Vlog #234)

Day one of our trip to Edinburgh.

“Klockworx” Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com)
Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License

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Another iPad screen smashed

Kids can be so clumsy at times. Well this time we don’t have the money to get it fixed yet. She will have to learn to live without her iPad for the time being.

Lazy Saturday

Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend.

Not much happened this Saturday due to back ache. I spent most of the day in bed, plus the meds were knocking me out so I kept falling asleep.

Not much done today due to resting up in bed with an achy back

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My health and fitness journey so far with Myfitnesspal and Fitbit

I have written this in the hope it helps someone. Even just one person. Hoping it helps to show people that things can be better. Things can improve. It is possible to improve your life, even if it’s only a bit. Maybes its just enough to make things more comfortable, bearable and easier for you.
How I got back problems in the first place.
When I was about 21 ( about 1989 ), I was very slim and tall, and enjoyed playing football ( soccer to you Yanks ) and going out for a few beers now and then. I was a bus driver. A job I really enjoyed. I got to drive around all day and meet people and have good conversations with some of them. Now, some of the busses had drivers seats that were twisted. Not loads, but enough so after driving in it for 3 or 4 hours, you could feel it. As this was a daily thing, over time, it started giving me pains in the lower back. Yeah, there were reports submitted and seats changed, but some drivers were, how can I say this nicely, rather large, and used to just drop themselves into the seats, which resulted in them getting damaged. This treatment on my back over the years left me with a bit of a weak back, which was susceptible to back pain and aches. Moving forward a good few years to about 12-15 years ago, I was coming down stairs at home with socks on my feet, and slipped. I ended up bouncing down the stairs on my heels, which jarred my back really bad. This is the point where I did the damage and I got my prolapsed disk in my back.
Being a new starter to using Myfitnesspal in a serious way, I thought I would tell you about my experience so far.
Last November I had yet another flare up in my back. I suffer from an inoperable back condition which, over time, is getting worse. This is not helped in the slightest by me not bothering to look after my body and just basically eating anything I want and at whatever time I want, even if its 2am when I’m sitting up watching T.V while on yet another period of sickness from work.
At the beginning of December 2014,after the last major flare up in my back which left me screaming the house down in pain and bed ridden for about 6 weeks, and after that, pretty much struggling to even walk any distance, I decided enough is enough. I decided I had wasted enough time wallowing in pain and walking around, stooped over like an old man. I’m only 46. I shouldn’t be in this state. Life shouldn’t be as bad as this. I decided, thats it, I AM GOING TO CHANGE THIS. The only way I can describe it is like a switch being flicked in my head which suddenly changed my attitude. I went from being miserable, depressive, and wallowing in self pity, doubt and worry, to I can do this, the only person who can help me is me, and I don’t want to end up in a wheelchair ( which is the way it looks like my body is heading in reality ) I need to sort my stuff out and refocus and look ahead with a positive mindset and take charge of my own wellbeing and life.
I have never, ever had such a strong feeling of positiveness before. I have no idea why it hit me so hard like a bolt out of the blue like it did. Sure, I was sick of the pain, depressive feelings. Sick of being a useless invalid, and not being able to do normal Dad stuff with my daughter, like run around, play, all the normal stuff most people take for granted. I couldn’t do anything for the fear that my back could go so daily. Theres no two ways about it, the fear and pain, ran ( and ruined ) my life
I already had a Fitbit One sitting in a drawer doing nothing so I searched it out, found the charge cable and sleep wristband then went about logging into my Myfitnesspal account that I opened a couple of years back but didn’t bother using it. I read posts and blogs about peoples successes and stories. Many of which have been really inspiring, and I recommend anyone to go to the blogs if they are feeling a bit down about their progress. I set about adding friends on Myfitnesspal. People who, when reading their statuses, their bio’s and blog posts, really inspired me, or people who have health issues like myself and have done massively well. The more I read Myfitnesspal and got interacting with the new friends I have made, the more positive I was feeling. Its like having a virtual extended family, who’s sole goal is all the same. To lose weight, become fitter and healthier.
I have to tell you, when you have gone years of being totally unfit, not being able to see a bright future and feeling a total burden on your family, to suddenly having this massive burst of enthusiasm and hope, and then your extended virtual family on Myfitnesspal show you so much love and support, gee you on, pick you up, give you good advice and re-motivate when you have a bad day, the feeling is so so good. You get to realise, you are no longer alone. There are others out there, who are approachable and friendly who can help you in your times of need.
One of the other great things about Myfitnesspal is the food diary section. This shows the nutritional content of almost everything I eat or drink. I can see at a glance how many calories I have left for that day and also plan ahead for meals or treats if I want one.
I have done slimming clubs a few times before but only been successful once and lost 3 stone (42lbs), but put it all back on a lot quicker that I lost it. Over the years, I have started to view slimming clubs as nothing more than money making machines, that feed on peoples guilt and insecurities. I really have a problem with paying for the privilege of being put under pressure to conform to the clubs diet rules of what you can eat and what you cannot and heaven forbid you gain a pound. You near enough get made to explain in front of the class the reason you gained.
On MFP I am so much happier. I have so much more freedom to eat basically what I want to eat, as long as I plan my food and keep within the nutritional goal I have set. So far in the 6 weeks I have been managing my own intake and exercise, I have only gained twice. Bear in mind, I now weigh myself every day so that I can track my weight over a period of time and see if any times show where I might gain weight. Also just out of keen interest to watch my weight change. I feel so in control of my own destiny using Myfitnesspal. If I gain weight, I know exactly why I have and I know the next day is a new day. I don’t have to be made to feel guilty in a class of people. I have seen loads of people, including myself, offering encouragement to others on Myfitnesspal, when they have had a day where they went over their calories etc. Like I said, we are all in this together for all the same reasons. Families ( even virtual ) need to stick together.
I have learned so much already about the foods I eat, and the rubbish I used to pile into my body.
Add to that, my Fitbit. It is one of those little pedometers that measure your steps, distance, floors climbed etc, sleep quality and duration and even wake you in the morning with a silent alarm if need be. I have since moved to a Fitbit Charge wristband which I prefer as I can wear it on my wrist so that I can see it better, rather than the One, which clips to your waistband ( or bra if you are a woman ). The fitbit monitors all the activities you do during the day and syncs it automatically to the Fitbit website. One there you can set yourself daily goals to reach, and try and beat each day. There are also challenges you can do and invite your Fitbit friends to join in with and compete against for the pure fun of it. Again, I have found most of the Fitbit users I have come across are really friendly. I have a few who I am friends with on Fitbit and Myfitnesspal at the same time so we can support each other in all aspects of our health journey, whether it be the fitness side of Fitbit or the nutritional side on Myfitnesspal.

Its now the 18th January 2014. Nearly 6 weeks into this, and I have lost 21 pound already. I would recommend anyone, to try doing this. Just get yourself a fitness tracker like a Fitbit for example, and join the Myfitnesspal family

All in all, having the support of my virtual families on Myfitnesspal and Fitbit, I have come along on this journey and not felt alone at all. My enthusiasm has paid off as my wife and daughter have also decided to join me on this journey to discover our new slimmer, fitter selves. This is a journey I know I will succeed in. I look forward to reaching the finishing line and shaking hands with the new smiling, healthier me.

Loving my fitbit and myfitnesspal

Well I’ve had enough. Had enough of being overweight and being in loads of pain with my knackered back.I have dug mine and Dee’s Fitbit’s out of the drawer and connected them back up to our myfitnesspal accounts. Dee wasn’t too impressed with having to log our foods, especially when it’s made from scratch so had to log the ingredients individually. That will get easier as once they are logged, its just a case of ticking the box to add them.
Using my fitbit is good fun.


For anyone who has used a Fitbit knows, it tracks you sleep, and how many floors you climb up, and steps you have taken and distance walked etc. Linking it to myfitnesspal means all the data from the Fitbit transfers automatically across to myfitnesspal so means all the data for weight and activity is gathered in one place. You can even pair it with a mobile app to keep track on your mobile phone. ( ios and Android )
I just weighed myself, and in the last week I have lost 3lbs. I’m happy with that, but also seeing it on the website as a graph makes a big difference. Its a mentality thing, but it helps with the motivation.
I’m just wanting to get my life back, where I can do activities with Gee, such as playing football of cycling etc. At the moment I can’t do any of that as my back will go so easily.

So, fingers crossed, this mindset will continue and I will lose weight and not end up in a wheelchair when I get older.

If any of yu good guys out there are on Fitbit or myfitnesspal, drop me a line with your usernames. On myfitnesspal I am stevew_68

I’ve been missing a while. Update on whats happened

Hi everyone, I hope you are all keeping well.

just a quick post today. I have not been on for quite a few weeks now as I have not been in the best of health. I was getting myself all prepared to go back to work after a LONG time off on the sick with severe depression, when I woke up one day with an achy back. I suffer from a prolapsed disk, and several degraded disks, which I think the specialist classes as Degenerative Disc Disease. So anyway, it got worse and worse on this episode, that at one point I screamed the house down in pain while sitting on the loo. Not a nice experience let me tell you. After that, I basically ended up bed bound for about 6 weeks until I was able to stand and support my own weight. I was in so much pain, I couldn’t even face the easy task of using the laptop. I just couldn’t function properly, mentally wise, due to the pain. I am so sick of this happening every so often. Every time, it adds to the worry that I could end up losing my job over it. They have told me they cannot operate as there is too much degradation in my disks that it will not take the pain away, and could even make it worse. so basically I am stuck with it and just loading myself with very strong pain killers for the rest of my life. I can deal with being disabled to some extent, but the pain is getting too much now.
Those lovely people at ATOS have turned me down for help in the past, when my sick pay ran out at work. Also the local council turned me down for a blue badge parking permit because I could walk too far, despite being in chronic pain and hunched over and shuffling along at a snails pace like some old man. Non of the governing bodies seen to want to offer support.

I have even gone so far as to invest in a wheelchair out of my own money, so as least when I’m in too much pain to walk, I may be able to get out of the house with my family.

me in wheelchair

I have an MRI scan today to see if it has got worse over the last couple of years. It feels like it has. I’ll let you know.

But thats me done for now. I just thought I would pop in and keep you updated.

Take care everyone.